Challenges

November 10, 2012- When I first started running with my mom in fourth or fifth grade, I would often want to stop and walk.  She always pointed to a landmark about 100 yards ahead and told me, "just run until that mailbox."  So I would run to that mailbox, and then she would point to a tree or telephone pole and say, "just run until we get there."  It was possible to run many miles this way.  Of course as I got older running became its own reward, but at the beginning I needed those little incentives to keep me going.
I have often found myself using this technique in China.  I tell myself, "you only have to stand in this line for ten more minutes" or "you only have to wait for this delayed train for half an hour."  There have been a few times now where I have been cold, tired and hungry, trying to get somewhere, and I have just known that I COULD NOT keep wandering the streets in the rain for one more minute, that if I didn't get something to eat in the next 30 seconds the world would just end.  So I just calmly tell myself, you only have to make it this far, you only have to wait a little longer.  It is possible to travel all over China this way, and to have some incredible adventures along the way. 
My teacher friend and I have been talking a lot recently about differences between China and the US.  By the way, I awkwardly don't know this girl's name.  I mean, when I got here, I was very overwhelmed, and I met many many people all at once.  This teacher has been very nice to me all along, but I can't remember if she told me her name and I forgot it or if she ever told me at all.  Either way, I have long felt that it is much too late to ask what her name is.  On Monday when we went to lunch together she told me her name meant "jade" so for now I guess I'll just refer to her as Jade and hope that she introduces herself to someone else in my presence.
So Jade and I have been talking about differences between China and the US, mostly about education and families.  Most of you are probably aware of China's one child policy, their attempt to control an out of control population.  A combination of this policy and an old-fashioned desire for boys rather than girls means that the population of China is noticeably skewed male.  If a family can only have one child, they want that child to be a boy to carry on the family line.  This is especially true with the older generation.  Jade's sister recently had a baby girl, and she told me that while her sister was not only overjoyed with her daughter but actually wanted a girl all along, her in-laws were very mad at her for having a girl and not a boy.  Like she could control it?  Anyway, think about it, this child is not only the only child of her parents, but also the only grandchild for four grandparents.  That's a lot of parental attention for one kid. 
I don't know whether I mentioned that my school is a boarding school.  All of the students live at school from Tuesday until the following Friday (11 days), and then have a long weekend.  Most of my students seem fine with this, but for my first graders, it is a new experience to be away from home for so long.  Last Monday, the students were returning and I watched as one of my first graders had to be dragged into school by one of his teachers while his mom and dad smiled and laughed.  It's like the first day of school but over and over again.  Sometimes my students will cry in class, and the other teachers are like, don't worry, he just misses his mom.  Jade was telling me that most students at our school live in the country where the schools are not as good, and their parents don't have time to take care of their kids.  I don't know how to feel about his.  I mean, it felt pretty monstrous to watch this kid being carried into school by his teacher and crying for his mom, but when I had class with him the next day he was fine.  And I know that his parents send him to our school so that he can get a good education.  I guess it's just very hard to imagine only having one child and then sending that child away to boarding school.
China is challenging the way that I think and forcing me to really consider and define the way that I think about the world.  It is exhilarating to see the world from such a different perspective, especially this week as both China and the US decided who would run their governments for the next several years.   I think that most people receiving these emails from me probably feel strongly about voting and did vote on Tuesday, but I also know that sometimes it can be really frustrating to have to listen to months of annoying campaign ads and attacks, and to feel like your opinions and votes don't make a real difference.  I just think it is important to remember how lucky we are to get to hear both sides of an argument, to make up our own minds and to participate in our government, no matter how meaningless our vote sometimes seems, because not everyone gets that chance.   

So if you've made it to the end of this very long post, thanks for indulging my rambling, and I hope that you are all well. I've attached a picture of my lunch with Jade.  We had hotpot.  We had a boiling pot of soup to which we added different raw ingredients such as beef, fish, some kind of chinese potato, and other things that I couldn't really identify.